you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I think my moral compass just broke
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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