I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
