Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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