That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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