Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
