Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
