dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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