Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Randomize
