Just cropdusted the office
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
