Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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