Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
