Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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