i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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