We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
