You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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