To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
