The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
