I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
