my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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