You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
