You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
