Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
