Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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