We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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