at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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