so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
