quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
