i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
