I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
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