I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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