I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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