Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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