I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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