Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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