Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
