i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
