I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
