Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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