FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
