Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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