No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
