if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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