You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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