I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I think people are normalizing furries
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
