if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
