I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
