ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Dignity is for republicans.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize