So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
