If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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