I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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